Election Fever?- Thank Heaven for the Queen Mum

 I was given a copy of the Queen Mother’s biography for Christmas and progress with this weighty tome has been slow even for an avid reader such as myself. Well thanks to old Culpability Brown, I think I have now found the ideal way of avoiding the drivel and hot air of the forthcoming General Election campaign.

No doubt “She who wears the Trousers” will be taking an interest in what Dave or more likely his wife says and does; but for me, I’m finding it wearisome already. The first Leaders debate is on Thursday, so close attention will be paid to what the leaders have to say – or more realistically don’t say.

I have only three points of interest regarding these debates:

1. Will Nick Clegg bring his Mrs along?

2. Will Gordon Brown be wearing that same purple tie?

3. Will “Dave” have a special parting in his hair for the event?

Answers on a postcard please, but don’t give them to Royal Mail: their recent track record with local to local correspondence does not inspire me with much confidence.

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